February 28, 2010

Don't Try This At Home.

This Bug wants to settle something once and for all. Pardon the tone but I like to jump right in. Lately a lot of folks have been noticing that I've lost some weight. And that's true. About 20 lbs. to be...approximate. But this did not- read: DID NOT happen overnight. It happened over a period of a year and half to be exact. There was a time when I used to exercise regularly and walk/jog a measly mile about four days a week. That doesn't happen anymore. When I run into people who haven't seen me in a while the remarks run the gamut from admiration, worry to outright side-eye hate. "Wow. You don't look any different from High School." or "I'm just used to seeing you with more meat on your bones. " to "Wow, you're so slim. Are you eating? Everything okay?" The last one is always delivered with a discernible tinge of sarcasm. But I guess going from 130ish to 112ish would raise a few eyebrows, so...

Let's get this straight. Yes, my frame has returned to the lithe figure I had senior year. Without dating myself to a tee- I'll say it's been at least um... not-so-roughly 10 years since then. Yeah, sounds good. But what many don't know (unless they read my tales of woe) is that a problem tooth last year is responsible for much of my weight loss. I was unable to eat solid food for just under 2 weeks. It was all about soup and milkshakes as if someone had cracked my jaw. (Kanyeezy I felt your pain, Homie.) And by the time I was back on normal food- it took a lot less to fill me up. I guess my stomach shrank? That happens, right? I still go in on the desserts with no shame, by the way. Pair that with very sporadic consumption of meat and the fact that I barely eat breakfast unless I'm starving and there you have it. Nothing too complicated.

Nowadays I eat regularly. I do calisthenics and a few moves to keep everything toned about three times a week. Booty injections are a cop out. It's all about squats for This Bug. I wear what the hell I want. Leggings. Clingy shirts. Trife shorts. I don't give a what. I flaunt that shit. And I am not too modest to say I blend right in with these young chicks and can give some of them a run for their money. I always had a bit of an hourglass once I (finally) filled out, so there's not a huge difference between then and now. The one thing I'm astounded/annoyed by is how much people can't hide their distaste for how I look now. I'm not too skinny. I'm healthy. Stop hatin'. It was a freakin' wisdom tooth from Hell that started all this, okay? I wouldn't wish that suffering on anyone. They should spend more time committing to diet and exercise than wondering if I'm a borderline crackhead or just have good genes. Speaking of which- between the ample boobies, narrow waist, meaty thighs, knobby knees and skinny calves that look like they belong on a Perdue roaster...I have officially become my mother.


Momz Circa '75

Bugz Circa '09

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'd work my mojo on that body! All though I'm a vegetarian, I like those chicken legs and everything above and between. Them milkshakes did your body good and got this boy wanting to go to the yard! Holla!

Jayne Neverow said...

Mojo? Ok Anon, who ever you may be- you have This Bug giving strong consideration to never posting actual photos ever again. Like...Never.

But thanks for the compliment.


I mean like Never. Again.

Jellz said...

LMFAO at that comment above. While i was reading this, my fat ass was eating a snickers smh. but ummmmm ur WAY skinnier now than u were in that pic with the trife shorts..im just sayin lolz. might i also add AK's friends almost broke their neck when u came outside in them lmao



love that pic of ur mom. i was like aww!!

Jayne Neverow said...

Snickers...Lol. You're right, tho. I'm at least 10 lbs lighter than when that pic was taken in July but I have no recent photos that really show how skinny the legs are. =)

By the way...which friends were those? I'm seriously considering unlocking my inner cougar. If you know some cubs...Lol.

Anonymous said...

Chiclet Man is that you!!...LMAO!!...SMH.

Jayne Neverow said...

I was wondering the same damn thing...