And if ya don't know- now ya know

The following was written under duress. Well, that's not entirely true. I've been low on energy, mojo and blog topics lately. There. I said it. And then my bee-yoo-ti-ful Cuz sends this my way. I've been tagged and so, here we are. A special thanks to Kari for greasing the wheels. Let's do this.

20 random things, shortcomings, facts, habits or goals this year:


1. It's not impossible to feel like a Queen without having a King at your side, but it surely makes a difference when you do. Everywhere begins to look like your kingdom.




2. I have always been insecure about my smile. Always.




3. Tending bar taught me more about the human condition in 3 short years than I could have hoped to learn in a lifetime.



4. (Spoiler Alert) I am moved to tears every time I watch the last 5 minutes of the movie Hair.




5. The very first time I got stumbling, shitfaced drunk was on Manischewitz wine. I was 11 years old. Shhhh...


6. It is my personal mission to meet Cee Lo Green and beg him to cover War's The World Is A Ghetto. If you know the song...and his voice- then you know this is right for the Universe.



7. My first kiss was with a boy in school who is now an openly gay man. A ridiculously irrational part of me still wonders if I was responsible for this in some way.

8. I've decided in 2009 that I don't want to get paid to do anything but write. Yeah.



9. The sign should simply read "Hot Crack Now". Krispy Kreme is the devil...and I need Jesus.



10. When my hair is straight I feel very astute- as though I look like I take myself too seriously. When it's wild or curly- I feel free-spirited, sexy and breezy.



11. Going to Jamaica and not sampling the "chief" export would have been like going to Paris and not trying the Champagne. Why would I do such a thing?





12. The quickest way to turn me off is to talk about money in attempts to impress me.


13. FYI: Nas and I share a beauty mark in the same place. Yessiree.



14. Unless I'm at a Day Spa, manicures and pedicures feel more like a chore than pampering to me. Ugghh!


15. Car accidents and rodents frighten me beyond human comprehension.



16. I've found that when most people say that I favor a celebrity, it's less about facial similarities and more about my hairstyle that particular day.






15. This Bug has never been arrested charged for a crime in her life. Knock wood.



18. In 2001, I stopped reading palms because I felt like I was interfering with the natural order of certain things.



19. Whenever I see something painful, my chocolate starfish hurts for just a millisecond. Wait, was that TMI?




20. I firmly believe there is a Muppet equivalent for every person out there.


And now, in keeping with said tagging inspiration, I nominate the Sweetest Tea from over at the Lion's Share. She may or may not comply...